How To Open A Coconut
In my experience I have not yet found a quiet way to do it, so get ready to make some noise! 
You’ll need:- a coconut (the hard, brown "hairy" kind) - large scissors - a fine mesh strainer - 2 cups or bowls - a brick or similar sized stone - a hard surface such as a cement floor - a bag which you don’t mind getting a little dirty (washable canvas shopping bags are an environmentally friendly option, or keep some extra paper or plastic bags around) Okay, ready? Here we go. How to open a coconut in five easy steps:1) Use the scissor to carve holes into two of the eyes of the coconut. Two are usually penetrable, and one is totally solid.2) Drain the coconut water into the first cup or bowl. Use the strainer over the second bowl and pour the coconut water through to strain out debris. Drink it fresh! 3) Now, wrap the coconut in the bag, and lay it on the hard surface. Hit the coconut quite hard with the brick until it cracks open. Then, you can use the same method to crack the larger pieces into smaller bits. 4) Separate the meat from the hard outer shell (sometimes it separates easily, or you can use a small knife to help wedge them apart). 5) Rinse the meat and enjoy.
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